A reflection from a few years ago.
Why the expression of despair? What purpose is there besides basking in the chemicals of your brain? Don’t deny it. You enjoy the despair; it makes you feel like the center of a cosmic tragedy, the misunderstood and noble hero of unimaginable agony of soul. Because in those moments, you reckon yourself to be the center of the universe of your own thoughts. You drown yourself in self-indulgent, self-infatuating thoughts.
With bitter lament, I hear the saints and angels with thundering voices, making the pillars of the earth to crumble, the face of the deep to hide in shame, and more, my sinful rebellious heart to tremble, crying out, “Treason! Treason! Treason in the cosmos! There is one God and one King and him only shall you serve! Who are you, O Man, that you should forsake your Creator and appoint yourself Sovereign? Repent! Repent in dust and ashes!”